- You don’t understand what you’re dealing with. You wear jeans yourself but you know better than to try buying her a pair. Why ever would you try to pick out something based on a general approximation of size? You shouldn’t.
- Your concept of “great idea” lingerie is not hers. Yes, corsets are lovely to look at and do amazing things to proportion…try before you buy, Mr!
- You lose the element of surprise. If you’ve already been to the store, seen it in a magazine, or purchased it online, you have an idea of what it looks like.
The Solution?
Buy her a giftcard to a lingerie store she really likes. If you don’t know where she likes to shop but have access to her lingerie, the place that makes the lingerie she wears when she’s dressing is a place she’ll be glad to visit again. If you’d never consider shopping with a woman, reconsider for a lingerie shopping trip. Make sure you’ve already bought that giftcard. Even though it has your money on it, using a gift card feels like its free.
Valentine’s Day is coming up. If you want to get her some lingerie, give her a gift card a week or two early. She’ll love you for it and I dare say you’ll enjoy what your gift inspires.
Best to you!
Seth
Phot credit: sklathill
Buying lingerie for a woman is definitely an advanced-relationship-level maneuver.
My husband (fiance at the time) brought me some lingerie as a gift when he went to Vegas for his bachelor party. He went to Agent Provocateur armed with my sizes, got the clerk to help him, and came back with something lovely that I absolutely enjoy wearing.
At that point, we’d already been together for just about seven years. Do not try this on your girlfriend of seven months. Take Seth’s advice and go for the gift card!
Melanie: Hi there! If you found a guy willing to put all that effort into finding something he knew you’d like, you did a good job in keeping him!
Thanks for stopping by.
Seth
Great advice Seth, I dated a guy for about 5 months and for my birthday that year he went and bought a skimpy little number. I know he had the best of intentions, but did not do his research first. he was so excited he wanted me to try it on right away. It did not fit, it was way to big. I am always one for a good laugh, but this was a little insulting to me. I thanked him for the gift, but was offended on the inside. I never did wear it again (we broke up shortly after, no the gift did not cause it). Lingerie is a personal thing to women the ability to suprise your guy with it is what makes it so fun!
I agree with you completely on this Seth!
have a good one
Nicky
It goes without saying that most men should adhere to this advice to avoid catastrophe this Valentine’s Day…or any day for that matter.
Great post as always.
I am curious…what color lingerie do most men prefer to see? Black or Red? Or does it even matter?
)
Nicky: It’s a great example of my point but I’m sorry it had to happen to you!
I hope you have a good one, too!
Thomas: This is why the ladies love you, man. Clean words in tight form. Awesome, man!
Henie: I don’t think it really matters. For the most part, once you’re down to lingerie, the color won’t matter for long anyhow!
I’m a big fan of earth tones… but that’s just me.
Best to all of you!
Seth
I agree with Melaine when she said buying lingerie is an “advanced relationship-level maneuver”. My father buys lingerie for my mother sometimes and they have 22 years old of marriage!
So that, a very high advanced level…
Great post!
i love the expression on the guy’s face in the photo!
the lingerie drawer can be a potential minefield in a relationship. your sense of humor and common sense in your solution is the best strategic solution for any man bold enough to consider lingerie as a gift.
this also works beautifully for women who buy lingerie for men. like me!
good stuff, seth!
There are some forms of lingerie that are classic.lovely.sensual.comfortable. E.g., silk charmeuse chemise and panties. Soft, satiny and very much welcomed. And enjoyable by Mr and Ms.
Hoong: I was ecstatic when I found it! =)
Diana: I think you are right. Something like a chemise is more forgiving when it comes to sizes, as well!
I want a big fuzzy bathrobe.
Yeah, I just said that. =)
Seth
Wow, what a great resource! Thanks for sharing this