As you interact with others, are you dismayed by your differences or delighted by the new perspectives?
Erin had one of the tiniest, most uncomfortable beds I’d ever slept in. She also liked to sleep while holding my left arm in a death grip, elbow-down. This limited my sleep options on the meat tenderizer she called a bed to either my left side or back. One particularly sleepless night, I began to look around for a distraction from the pain of my left arm slowly being severed from my body.
There were paintings everywhere. Stacked along the floor, the walls, and even one on the ceiling. A nearby streetlamp haphazardly tossed light through one of the windows and across the paintings. It was just bright enough to see and, one by one, I made up a story about each painting. There was a field of cheddar cheese, a depressed pomegranate, and a family of algebra 1 equations stuck on a fence, among others.
Hours later, Erin woke and I told her my version of how each painting came to be . She listened, she laughed, but she did not tell me I was wrong. She had created every painting in that room but did not mind that my late-night perceptions of her art were probably very different from hers. She could have been angry and said that I was mocking her artwork or making fun of her perspective. It might have escalated into a full-blown argument. She could have told me to get off the meat tenderizer and out of her house.
But she didn’t.
She simply enjoyed our conversation as I took secret delight in seeing that my left arm still functioned normally.
My experience with Erin and her paintings often comes to mind as I interact with new people and work to understand their perspectives.
We are all very different people with unique (and often, quite passionate) views of the world around us. If we seek to love only those with views perfectly-aligned with our own, we will suffer disappointment because nobody ever matches up perfectly. However, if we reach out like Erin and embrace new perspectives, an ever-expanding world of ideas awaits us.
What do you think?
13 Comments
I think this is very wise.
How many relationships (mine included!) have I seen go south because of this? So often we become interested in someone simply because of how they’re different. And then over time, whether it’s months or years, those differences somehow morph into being irritants instead of intriguing.
One thing I know is that I can trust 100% of the people to always, inevitably, be themselves. And why, at least when I’m being reasonably sane (!), would I want them to be anything else?
Thanks, Seth!
Yes. “opposites attract” but what about when those opposites grow into annoyances because we’ve fallen into details and stopped celebrating the person?
You are so very right in saying that people will always be themselves, give enough time. What better reason to start off with less games and more honesty!
Best to you!
=)
I completely agree! I think people suffer from ignorance when they close-off those who are not like themselves.
There are initial similarities that can often attract us to people at first, but it’s the intricate differences that draw us in more.
good post!
Oh, Seth…this is the penguinest!:~)
I love this! As I was reading, I was relating to my studio where paintings lean up against all walls like fallen soldiers; piles of photographs awaiting their final destination edits and journals leaning like the Tower of Pisa! My haven…yet anyone close enough to be welcomed has been an absolute joy…perspective is simply perspective, where there are no differences just additions! And it matters not whether they are supporter or participant…it’s all good…like the “Erin-way!” :~)
All relationships should be without expectations, that every facet culminates to that incredible brilliance!
See what happens when you write about passion and art? I for one can’t stop long enough to make a judgement and I like it that way!
Oh, I have an extra prosthetic arm in my studio should yours fall off! :~)
“Though we see it through the varied hues…it’s still the same rainbow!” ~Henie~
Ping-pongssssssssssss!
Henie, you are very kind but I somehow doubt that the prosthetic arm in your studio would serve as a proper replacement. Wait..why do you have prosthetic limbs hanging around your house?
Per usual, you always come through with the self-quote. Lovely! =)
Hi Seth…
May I remind you that I am an artist/sculptor as well thus requiring models of all types:~)…and Anatomy studies has pushed me even further, short of having cadavers around…I know, I know…and my world expands and on and on and on!
Might I suggest…should your arm be completely amputated by Erin, that you donate it to me so perhaps I can sculpt a new one to scale for you? lol!
Thanks you for appreciating my quotes! :~)
I like this. Made me think. And I agree with it wholeheartedly. I wonder if you’ll ever write a story I don’t like, Seth?
x
J
It’s like you read my life lol.. I love this post.. I like Erin, she is so much like me. Communication and the enjoyment of a dialogue is more important. As an artist myself, I always allow people to give their interpretation of what they perceive the work to be. Then I draw from that and makeit an inspiration for the next artwork.
when it comes to relationships, we don’t always have to be alike in all that we do or want. Being too similar, would be too boring. Accepting the other person for who he or she will allow the relationship more stability. Yes Seth, less games and more honesty. great post as always. Thank you for sharing.
Misty…sleep in odd positions and slowly tear arms off? =P Being too similar is definitely boring!