Comments on: Dating On A Wire: Online Relationships

By: single Chicago

single Chicago — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 07:55:31 +0000

The more important thing about online dating is “How you take it? not others”. Blind date are still a matter of concern about the security. One should share it with someone they can trust.

By: russruggles

russruggles — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 07:34:47 +0000

It really blows my mind that there are so many people who are still skeptical, or even secretive about online dating. I really find it insulting when I read a profile by a potential match “qualifying” their presence on the site with stuff like “my friends talked me into this.” Well, I guess I must be a real loser for trying online dating in earnest, huh?

It really must have felt liberating for your date’s friends to know the truth about you, but she must have been at least a little upset about your announcement!

By: UkrainianGirls

UkrainianGirls — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 09:55:50 +0000

I think that it is a very interesting and amusing article. Practically all its main points are true.

By: @bar0s

@bar0s — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 00:53:00 +0000

i can totally relate to this post. i met and befriended hundreds of people online through social network sites, chat and online groups and met them offline. i ended up dating a few of ‘em. the WWW changed my perception of dating. it changed my perception of online connection being that anonymous. yes it is easy to lie online but i am who i am online and offline. no pretentions, i dont want someone i met online expect that much from me and end up being disappointed.

i also agree on what misty said that some people think that we online people have no life. i met someone really great a few years back but distance is our problem. friends and family of that someone did not approve of what he had. oh well.

By: Seth

Seth — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 12:49:01 +0000

Zacharia: That’s a really good point. I’ll make sure I run my post on STI’s by you before it goes live.

Is there anybody who isn’t turned off by lies? I know there’s that song about “sweet little lies”, but really, I agree with you that lying is never a good way to start a relationship. Introducing any sort of doubt right at the beginning of a relationship is a fantastic way of starting a collision-course to failure.

By: zechariahaloysius

zechariahaloysius — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 09:22:44 +0000

I just thought about one thing–probably a good conversation point. Because of stigma, many people are not comfortable confessing that they are HIV positive online. As an HIV positive person who worked for an HIV/AIDS services agency and is married to an HIV negative guy, I don’t hide my status.

However, both hetero- and homosexual men and women often feel stigmatized by this. I would recommend not answering the question at all online. If you like someone enough to meet them, tell them then. If they ask you before that, you might simply ask “are you concerned I might not like you if I found out you were HIV positive. I assure you that’s not true.” might be a good way to avoid the question if it’s being asked to be nosy (rudeness) and a way to be accepting of the person if they are trying to connect with you.

Definitely avoid lying about it though–you ruin relationships before they have a chance to begin. Someone who would not be turned off by one’s serostatus might be turned off by a liar…

By: zechariahaloysius

zechariahaloysius — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 09:16:58 +0000

I met all of my Seattle friends online before I moved there, including the people I stayed with before going. It was the best experience I’d ever had. Be honest, be yourself, and you will never be disappointing or dissapointed.

By: Misty Belardo

Misty Belardo — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 15:29:50 +0000

I think this post is pretty cool. I am a very friendly person and i love meeting people online and offline. I am who i am here and for “real”. I can totally relate to your post.

I met a guy online and he was pretty nice.. we became very close but distance was our problem.

We said will see what happens but when his family found out about our friendship, they did not agree.

So nothing much really happened after that. I guess some people do think that we online people have no life, they just dont see us as real people. funny right.. well we are real people on here. we just love to interact and like our world to expand beyond borders. Cool post I just love it!
: )

By: kelli

kelli — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 06:28:27 +0000

nice job seth! i’ve faced my share of guys who don’t want to admit to online meetings (even though 1 in 8 marriages these days are from online connections… you would think we’ve lost the stigma! anyway…) then I met my ex… in a grocery store. At the fish counter. And he wanted to tell everyone we met… online. LOL

By: Jared

Jared — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 07:21:38 +0000

I can’t think of any relationshippy-type situation I’ve had that didn’t have some sort of online component to it. It’s such a part of my life that I think if something occurred completely offline I would honestly question it a bit, because the Internet is so intimately tied to my day-to-day activities.

The part of this post that most closely resonated with me was the bit about admitting to passions and embracing them; it’s such great freedom to be able to be honest with yourself, and it’s hard to be honest with others if you’re not honest with yourself. This is a recent discovery for me, and doesn’t happen overnight (I still struggle a bit with it). It’s a great boost to the ol’ confidence-meter when you are able to be comfortable in your own skin.