Dating Advice

Have I Found The One?

41 Comments 17 August 2009

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Have I found the one? We all tend to ask ourselves if we have found the one at some point in a relationship. You know, the person who makes you suddenly believe that nobody else could ever come even close? Yep, that one.

I recently asked the following question on Twitter:

“Married Peeps: What 140 characters of advice would you give to a single guy/gal who thinks “this one” might be “THE one”? Thanks!”

Have I found the one?

The responses were thoughtful, heartfelt, and humorous at times. I’ve placed the best answers below for you to peruse and perhaps even learn something from. Enjoy!

Relationship Advice - Happy Couple

“Establish that your values are mostly similar & your opinions mostly different—& keep it that way.” – Daniel Thurston

“There is no ‘the one.’ But the one you choose for life becomes the one. Advice- Treat her like the one, and make yourself the two!” -Jay Brock

Relationship Advice - Arguing Couple

“New serious couples should discuss/weigh the big things (kids, church, money, heritage). It’s not all about romance.” – Dave Peckens

“My advice – There’s no “think.” You feel or you know, but thinking gets you in trouble.” – Ray Hartjen

Relationship Advice - Tired Couple

“Advice: Give it a yr or 2 & have UR own lives.Focus on character, similar interests, how look at $/religion and values>then vows.” -Stacey Ross

“Don’t hyphenate when you marry! If she is the one, you still have to work at letting her know that, year after year.” – Rob Kerley

Relationship Advice - Windy Couple

“Have you had a real fight? If not start one. If so, can you do it with love and respect? If not, wait until you can!” – Jesse Friedman

“What do you know about his/her childhood? family issues — and relationship w/siblings & live parents — will impact marriage. Dysfunctional family relationships in potential spouse not a deal breaker. But go in w/eyes open.” – Sarah Gilbert

Smiling Couple - Relationship Advice

“If you “think” they are the one, then they are not. When you know, you know.” – Michel Fortin

“Can you take a week-long vacay with her and not get into any blow-out-type fights? If yes, you’re well on your way.” – Arik Hanson

Relationship Advice - Happy Old Couple

“Have patience. If you don’t have it, learn it. and if you have it, get more.” – Justin Parks

“Marriage is 10% bliss and 90% forgiveness of the other person’s shortcomings. Hard work but worth it.” – Nictos

Relationship Advice - Silly Couple

“[you’ll need (to be)] Sense of humor; thoughtfulness; supportive; understanding; be impressed by each other; unconditional trust; separate bank accounts.” – Teri Rehkopf

“If she doesn’t help inspire you each day, she’s not the one. Just working on 34 years, tho, so could be something different.” – Michael Whitlow

Relationship Advice - Inspiration

I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did. If some bit of advice resonated with you, take a moment to get in touch with the author (names link to websites) and say thanks!

Have I found the one? If you have a bit of advice you’d like to add, share it in a comment. Thank you!

Photo credit: adwriter, is katz, skedonk, carlos nicora, theerin, fotorita, mad mannequin,


- who has written 34 posts on The Dating Papers.

S drinks a lot of tea and enjoys late-night walks on the beach. He lives with his beta, Balthasar.

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41 Comments so far

  1. Zouhir says:

    that he would do anything to get back with me and i didn’t resnopd because I don’t want to be with him.And last night he texted me asking how i was doing and stuff and i told him i was doing fine and he said he was doing fine too but he missed me and then he texted me hey i’ll hit you up later when my girl isn’t texting me. So last night and a little bit this morning i was wondering what he meant.This morning he texted me a few times and I didn’t reply until he accidentally sent me a text saying hey i had fun last night, i love you. He told me he meant to send it to his girlfriend. I didn’t ask who his girlfriend was because I didn’t really care. So he was talking to me about how awesome his girlfriend is and I was acting happy for him because if I acted pissy about it then it would make me look bad. So then he randomly started calling me ugly and gross and stuff and I acted like it didn’t phase me. I mean it hurt my feelings a little but I don’t think i’m ugly. It makes my blood boil and i want to tell him what i really think of him.My friend thinks that he is just trying to play games with me and make me jealous so I beg for him back, I mean it sounds like something he would do but I don’t know. I just want him to leave me alone.So what i’m asking is that whats the right thing to do in this situation? Should i yell at him and call him ugly, continue what i was doing or something else?Please help.

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