Tag archive for "love"

Single People: 5 Ways To Treat Yourself Better This Holiday Season

Communication, Dating Advice

Single People: 5 Ways To Treat Yourself Better This Holiday Season

41 Comments 25 November 2009

lonely winter walkBeing single during the holidays, frankly, sucks. From ancient relatives asking about the whereabouts of childhood crushes to advertising that consistently depicts joyful couples,¬†winter holidays are chock full of reminders that being single isn’t “cool.”

Instead of griping that you don’t have a darling to risk purchasing the wrong gifts for, why not take some time this holiday to give yourself some needed “me-time”?

With the assumption that you’re taking at least basic care of your body, here are 5 ways you can improve the way you treat your inner self over the coming weeks (and beyond):

  1. Make a pact. Find a good friend you can call whenever you’re feeling an urge to call one of your exes. Agree to make time for their call when it comes as they’ll do for you. This trick has saved me from following through on numerous bad decisions that could have really brought a lot more pain into my life. Walking in the woods on a snowy Christmas eve by yourself? Call your friend. Just a moment or two of conversation will do a lot to help you kick your mood and get back to the fun stuff.
  2. Seek out sustainable friendships. If you’ve only got time for quick phone calls and a get-together every few weeks, find people who understand your schedule and are glad to get what time they can from you. Trying to maintain relationships with time-hungry people will leave you feeling like you’re a bad friend. The reverse applies. If you’ve got lots of time, don’t chase the jet-set!

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Baring Breasts: Courting With Acceptance

Dating Advice

Baring Breasts: Courting With Acceptance

18 Comments 30 November 2008

One recent Thanksgiving conversation with my uncles turned to desperately racist jokes. Always game for discussion, I called my uncle out on his joke. His response? “I’m the most tolerant person you’ll ever meet.” I’ve continued to think about his response and how, to him, being tolerant was enough.

If you want to build relationships that are structured to be rewarding in the long term, you’ll learn to be more than tolerant. You’ll learn to accept.

Tolerance has been tossed around a lot in recent years as political, religious, and racial groups discuss how others must tolerate differing agendas, beliefs, and cultures. But toleration brings with it the idea that what you’re tolerating is something inferior. You might tolerate a differing opinion, or you could accept it as an idea while choosing to disagree with it. See the difference? To illustrate:

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Making A Lady Smile: Clicky Shoes

Dating Advice

Making A Lady Smile: Clicky Shoes

17 Comments 20 November 2008

I make no claims at understanding anybody fully. Instead, I see many people as possessing what I term “user manuals” that have useful information regarding that person. As you get to know somebody, you “add pages” to the manual you have on them and gain a better understanding of how they work and what keeps them in happy working order. Just as changing the oil regularly applies as a good practice in the maintenance of most cars, so there are some things that can be broadly applied to people. I’m more than happy to hear from exceptions. For the record, referring to a SigOt individually with use of automotive terms will not gain you points.

That said: The Deal With Ladies & Their Fascination With Clicky Shoes (Plus, what you can learn from this relationship!)

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